nearly there

i finished up the painting, let it dry, and placed the carpet treads down to see how they look and i think it looks okay. i haven’t taped them down yet cuz i want to make sure jones is okay with using them (merle always shimmied up the outside of the plastic treads, so unsure what she’ll do now). it definitely makes walking on the steps a lot quieter.

now i need to clean up the wood trim (or should i paint it?), but i’ll save that for another snowy day.

almost done!

the paint went on so well with the cutting-in brush that i just kept at it instead of using the roller. i went heavy on the risers and light on the treads just to make sure i had enough paint. i ended up with a bunch leftover, so when this coat dried, i went over it once more with a roller to make sure i got all the risers.

i used a spotlight so i think i got everything, but it’s not like anyone would be able to see imperfections with just the hallway light on.

made it

well, i made it to today. it didn’t feel like i would for a while there. the feeling i keep coming back to is that of betrayal. having the faith that you’re with a lifetime partner and that disappearing is the embarrassing thought that overwhelms me, and the frustrating notion that follows is whether or not i’ll find or even trust someone else to be with. what if i don’t?

anyway, it wouldn’t be birthday week without a project, since i can’t just relax and do vacation stuff. i prepped the stairs on saturday with the intention of priming them yesterday while merle was at the vet, but we know now how that went.

i had to cut in a lot, thankfully i had a good teacher when i bought the house. that took a little over an hour, so i hooked up the fan and had lunch.

after it was clearly dry, i busted out the roller and covered the rest of the blue. it didn’t coat as well as i would like, so i think i’m going to need to touch up the risers at least, since the treads are going to be mostly covered with carpet, i don’t have much concern with the coverage on them except for 2-3″ on either edge.

this afternoon, i have a dentist appointment and then am meeting a couple of friends at “the mezz”, which is the bar inside of festival foods. since there’s not much time between now and the dentist, i think i’ll apply the actual paint tomorrow.


i just dropped merle off at the vet to get her teeth cleaned. i have varying levels of nervousness when it comes to animals and sedation. i suppose i should get over it. they’re doctors and they know what they’re doing. although, i thought that about the ferret doctor when i took zona in to get the growth removed from her tail and she didn’t wake back up.

i should be painting the steps right now but i haven’t worked up the gumption yet.

judy came over on friday to fix the risers that had fallen and also removed all of the plastic treads. i washed them on saturday, which was probably the first time they’d ever been cleaned. they look kinda nice now, aside from the fact that they’re blue.

slept okay

thanks to the muscle relaxer, i slept through, but woke up at 5:30. i started work around 7, so the schedule of the day shifted greatly.

i had planned on working from home because the weather was predicted to be 38° and rainy (my least favorite, if you recall) so i scheduled picking a friend up to come over and fix the stairs leading up to the bedrooms.

the second and third risers appeared to be held in place by nails and caulk (maybe they all are?):

i wanted to get them flush back up because i’m going to paint them and put carpet treads on. i think that’s why jones has stopped coming upstairs to sleep, cuz he might slip on those stupid plastic treads.

i can’t believe it’s taken me nearly 11 years to start this project. anyway, the treads are gone, the risers are flush, and i get to make a trip to menards tomorrow to get primer and caulk. i should probably locate the paint scraper unless that went with matt and the toolbox.

oh, yea, i also need to get a toolbox. i have one from my dad but i don’t think i want to use it.

dreary day

this is my least favorite biking weather; 32° and rain. it also means that i won’t want to leave the house when i’m done working this evening. which is fine, i guess; i’m getting used to the routine.

i typically get home around 3:30, jones begs for a walk until about 4, then we go for a walk, i work until about 5:30 and then feed the dogs and clean up the dishes from last night’s dinner. i knit for a while on the couch until 6:30 and then start dinner. i knit and watch the office while dinner is cooking. then i eat, knit some more, and go to bed when i get tired.


crazy weekend for an introvert

actually, i guess it wasn’t that crazy. it was just full. i went out to my aunt’s for sunday lunch and, when i heard from joe that he was back from rockford, i came home so he could stop by. jones recognized him and showed off arty (the aardvark) and then laid on the couch. joe’s not one for sticking around long, so he let me know he had plans to meet peanut and kurt at mickey’s. knowing jay might want to see everyone, i invited him down, too.

previously, at lunch, one aunt had asked me if i had any favorite authors or had been reading anything, and i admitted that my reading was mostly technical and not too much in the recreational department. so, in a funny turn of events, flannery o’connor came up (an acquaintance is opening a bar downtown, which he’s naming “flannery’s”) and i just went to look at the options on amazon. the cover art is a peacock, so of course, i’m going to buy a hard copy.

i like short story fiction (roald dahl, shirley jackson, stephen king), so it should fit in with my library.

to follow up on the friend looking for a room… i had to say no. i’m struggling with that decision because he’s sleeping in his unheated storage unit. but i know that i need to focus on me and a routine that isn’t based on someone else’s schedule and the dogs don’t need yet another stressful disruption.

even though it would be advantageous to have him here for rent and to fix up stuff around the house. but, he’s the kind of guy who wouldn’t take a renegotiation, even if i insisted.

what just happened?

this was the first weekend without him.

i was only slightly productive in moving some things around in the bedroom and vacuuming. it’s nice to be able to have the upstairs front room door open (since the cats are gone); it lets the daylight in. it’s also nice to have the study door open.

i was supposed to get brunch with p&m on saturday, but shark week has started, and my cramps were dictating that i stay home. i was able to get to woodman’s and made some roasted chicken with asparagus. sunday, i was a little early to meet an ex-AG-coworker and ran into an old friend who was out of town for almost a year. it was good to see him. then my brunch date showed up and i got to belly-laugh for the first time in what seemed like forEVER.

my sleep schedule got all mixed up and i wasn’t in shape to be productive at work today, but i brought merle anyway, and we had an okay time. she started to get a little antsy around 1330 so we came home early. i love that place. the flexibility and people and trust is really the best thing right now as i figure out wtf my life looks like now.


he packed and moved some more stuff yesterday and asked if the cats could stay until sunday because he hadn’t gotten his bedroom straightened out for them yet. i said okay because if anyone should be shielded from stress, it should be nero.

at 2:30 this morning, i was woken by an unusual crashing sound. i got downstairs and the birdcage was on its side and alex was in the room. i’m not really sure if it was him that did it because he usually appeared to be the least interested in the bird. anyway, matt got some terse texts and a pissed off phone call.

he came and got the cats today. i will miss them a little, but i will not miss the smell of their litter boxes every time the furnace kicks in.


i got home to a nearly empty house. he had run out of time, so the cats were still here. a fact which i was surprisingly happy to learn about.

after a short sob-session, once i realized this was my future, i separated out the vinyl that i think is mine but really have no idea because i never played any of it on his turntable and i don’t own one myself, so i don’t even know why it matters.

then, i and the four-leggeds hung out on the couches while i played fallout. i’m nearing the point in the game where i need to do some longer missions in order to level up so that i can do the even longer ones. so i have to save those for a weekend.

i went to bed embarrassingly early and woke up for an hour or so at 1:30 and again at 5. the alarm went off and i snoozed cuz i was back into rem sleep.