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i just had my first panic attack while at lunch with some workmates. i was really uncomfortable and sweaty and shakey. we were at casa bianca and there were seven of us sitting around a table. everyone was nice about it and for that i am thankful. i couldn’t even eat my pizza cuz i was too shakey to pick it up. :/ big thanks to colin for getting me a straw. and to kelly for getting a box for my pizza. and jesse for driving my car back to work. and everyone else for putting up with me for a minute. i’m only telling you, reader, as documentation for myself. oh, needless to say, i came home.. didn’t even go in the building.